“The piano had survived somehow, Ma’am…”, she walked towards it slowly. Memory seems to be the force of attraction. She removed the veil of the piano. The fire had left it unhurt. Her slender fingers open the cover of the keys before brushing them. A cheat touched her fingers; it had been tucked in the hinge of the cover. He had scribbled in his exquisite handwriting–can’t live without you…am coming to you…A smile passed over her lips. “Ma’am…”, the young attendant was going to say s’thing when she saw the tall stature was getting dissolved into air.
Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers 03/07/2017
Advertisements
Lovely story, but a bit confusing, especially at the end. Starting at ‘s’thing’ I lost the story. Who is the ‘she’ in the last line? The protagonist or the attendant? What statue?
For this line – ‘“Ma’am…”, the young attendant was going to say s’thing’ I’d suggest changing to something like ‘the young attendant began. But, besides all that, I think you have written a beautifully poignant story.
LikeLike
She was the attendant…and its stature not statue meaning height or something like that to denote a shape…thanks for the suggestion I’ll lookout for the change to see it fit the 100 words limit…
LikeLike